weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
