He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
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I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
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I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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