My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
