Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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