I swear she didn't look like that last week.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
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