my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
