last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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