my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
