C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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