I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
do nipples grow back?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize