I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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