I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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