god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
More tranny stories later!
tell your sister to shave her snatch
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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