I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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