i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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