Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
