Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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