I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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