plz talk dirty to me
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
just tell him i said nine months
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
