mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
