It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever