Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize