He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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