whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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