No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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