I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
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then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
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I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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