plz talk dirty to me
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
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