we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Swine flu is the new snow day.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
