I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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