Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
