so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
