capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
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