YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Send help, water and tortillas.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
