i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
