So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Randomize
