he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
