we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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