I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Randomize
