Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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