I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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