So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
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wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
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He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My ass is underappreciated
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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