i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
