I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
