census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
