If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
