i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Panties = found
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