im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You made out with two different species that night
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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