No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
