do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Green mimosas i think yes
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize