If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
How does one acquire holy water?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
